Sox get down at Lowell’s Dancing with the All Stars

Mike Lowell, Dustin Pedroia, Jonathan Papelbon and Alex Cora each made asses of themselves for charity last night.

The “Dancing with the All-Stars” event benefited Lowell’s charity, which raises money to help treat Miami and Boston kids who have cancer.

Lowell won the event, and Pedroia must be developing a little brother complex after losing to the third baseman in both ping pong and dancing over the last week.

Papelbon wore a hideous black lace shirt that he somehow pulled off.

At this point, would you flinch if Papelbon channeled Kevin Bacon in Footloose and did a back flip on the mound while yelling, “Hey, hey! What’s this I see? I thought this was a party. LET’S DANCE! “

Me neither.

Pedroia made up for his lack of drag by ripping off his shirt while he was on the dance floor and throwing it to John Henry. For reasons that will probably never be known, “Daddy” was written across his chest in glitter.

Terry Francona described Pedroia’s idiocy as follows:

“I thought I was going to have a heart attack. My chest hurt, I was laughing so hard. Pedroia is a moron. You can write that. He is a moron. He was dancing, he looked like a puppet on a string. He’s such a little gamer, but he’s looking over knowing we were crushing him. He’s drinking the Red Bull. He’s exhausted. He’s trying to do these things with this girl he’s not strong enough to do. It was hilarious.”

Sox and Dogs has some video footage if you want to take a look.